People Ask
by loonygirl22
Summary: People ask a lot of things. HHR.


**A/N:** This is the last installment of the People Series. I hope you enjoy this as much as I enjoyed writing it.

* * *

"Why is the moon round?"

"Because gravity pulls—"

"I was joking."

"I was just answering a question."

"Why are you so cranky, Hermione?"

"I'm stressed."

"Why?"

"Because I have a lot of work to do."

"Why?"

"Because that's what grown-ups do?"

"Are you asking me?"

"Stop it with the questions, Harry."

"I can't stop."

"You just did!"

"You think?"

"Ugh."

"Do you think George did this on purpose?"

"What did George do to you, Harry?"

"How did he make me drink his 'Question Me' prototype?"

"He made you drink what? So all you can say are questions?"

"No."

"What?"

"Can I say 'crap!'?"

"You're confusing me, Harry."

"Did George say that once I take the potion, all I can say—or ask for this matter—are questions and I can only say 20 statements for the duration of the potion and the only way to stop this is to ask someone a really hard question and let them answer it?"

"Genius."

"Hermione! Oh, crap."

"What? It is. And don't use up those statements in simple words, Harry."

"What is the matter with me?"

"I honestly don't know."

"How do I fix this?"

"Ask George. He's getting curious."

"That is not a funny joke, Hermione."

"You know it was. And you only have 15 statements left."

"How did you know that?"

"I counted."

"Are you such a smartass that you recounted our conversation and picked out the statements from the questions?"

"Well, yes."

"Can I say that I find that sexy?"

"That's weird, but yes."

"Why don't we—?"

"Why don't _you_ ask me that hard question so we can get this over and done with?"

"That would be a lost cause. _Crap!_"

"14."

"Why don't I just shut up?"

"Knowing George, that potion won't allow you. And knowing you, you can't do that."

"Why are you so smart?"

"I try. Just ask me so we could get this over with."

"Haven't you realized that it would be very hard to ask you something that Merlin and everyone knows that you know the answer to?"

"Then ask me something I don't know then."

"Why would I bother?"

"Because I'm sure it wouldn't work on anyone else. And I'm pretty sure the first person you ask would be the only person who can answer the ultimate question."

"See? I didn't even know that!"

"13."

"I said 'see?'!"

"12."

"Holy mother—"

"11."

"Why? Why do this to me, George?"

"Hey, he's getting curious."

"Didn't I say it wasn't a funny joke, Hermione?"

"Sorry, couldn't help it."

"What would be the ultimate question?"

"Just ask already."

"What is the meaning of life? Is there a heaven and hell?"

"Yes. I could totally answer those."

"If train A leaves the station at 9 am in Paris and train B leaves 35 minutes later at Berlin—?"

"I can answer that!"

"Really?"

"Yes! What's the rest of the problem?"

"I forgot."

"Ugh! 10!"

"Do you think I'll figure this out?"

"Of course, honey."

"When will I do that?"

"In time."

"That sucks."

"9."

"Can you stop counting?"

"Why?"

"It's making me nervous."

"8."

"Stop it!"

"7."

"Really!"

"6."

"Hermione!"

"5. You have to stop now, Harry."

"Why are you so stubborn?"

"Why do you drink random potion prototypes?"

"I honestly don't know."

"4."

"Shit."

"3."

"Why do I bother?"

"You can do it, Harry. C'mon, think!"

"I give up."

"2. No, don't!"

"Hermione."

"Oh, no! You don't have any statements left!"

"Don't you think it's sweet that my last statement was 'Hermione'?"

"Of course. And I love you for it."

"Do you know how much I love you?"

"How much?"

"Do you think I could answer that in a statement let alone a question?"

"You're so sweet, you know that?"

"Would you answer this for me, please?"

"Anything."

"Will you marry me?"

"Yes."

"You will?"

"Absolutely."

"Really?"

"Yes!"

"Wooohooo!?"

"…"

"…"

"…"

"…"

"What? What's wrong, Harry?"

"Why hasn't it worn off yet?"

"It's a little anticlimactic, don't you think?"

"Did I really think it would be that easy?"

"Well…"

"Don't you think asking someone to marry you is an ultimate question?"

"Yes, but my answer has long been decided."

"Seriously?"

"Naturally."

"How many children do want?"

"A whole quidditch team."

"A whole quidditch team?!"

"Obviously! We both don't have siblings. I think it'd be rather fun."

"Have you thought of their names?"

"Darwin, Sophia, Jacob, Timothy, Gabriel, Abigail, maybe Isabel or Elizabeth. It depends."

"No James or Lily?"

"Only if you want to."

"Have you already figured out that I want to have James and Lily as their second names?"

"No. But I'm glad you give me a lot of credit."

"Do you know I want to say, 'cheeky girl'?"

"Yes. Most definitely."

"What is the ultimate question?!"

"Just think, love. I'm bound to be stumped by one of your questions someday."

"Why don't I just ask you a silly one?"

"Go ahead, maybe it would work."

"Can you cry under the water?"

"Of course you can."

"Why is a round pizza put in a square box?"

"Would you rather have a round box?"

"Why go to the top of a tall building only to put money in binoculars to look at things on the ground?"

"Never really thought of that before."

"Does a person have to be important before they are considered assassinated instead of just plain murdered?"

"It's a matter of the media, I guess."

"Where in the nursery rhyme does it say Humpty Dumpty is an egg?"

"Humpty Dumpty is commonly portrayed as an egg. It's supposed to be a riddle—"

"Why is it that when something is sent in a car, it's called shipment, and yet when something is sent in a ship, it's called cargo?"

"Harry…"

"If today is the first day of the rest of our lives, what in the world was yesterday?"

"You've really bottled up those questions, huh?"

"Did you ever like Draco?"

"…what?"

"Did—?"

"What? No!"

"You—?"

"That's just wrong, Harry!"

"Draco? Really?"

"No! Never!"

"Do you honestly think I wouldn't know if you're lying?"

"I'm not lying!"

"Hermione? Really? Draco?"

"Fine!"

"WHAT?!"

"Alright! I admit it. I had this weird dream about him. ONCE! I really don't know how or why that happened, it just did! And it was after he turned—"

"Ahhhhhhhhhhhh!!"

"In my defense, he did look better?"

"Hermione!"

"I know! I'm sorry! It was just one dream! And after that I never felt anything for him, I swear to Merlin, Harry!"

"My ears! My eyes! My brain!"

"Oh, shut up! I know you had this weird fantasy about Pansy!"

"I never—"

"Yeah, right! I overheard you talking to Ron about it!"

"That was years ago, Hermione!"

"Ha! So you _did_ have this thing for Pansy!"

"Why you—!"

"The potion's gone."

"What? Hey! You're right!"

"Call it even?"

"Ugh, Draco?"

"Ugh, Pansy?"

"It's even."

"Thank you."

"I can't believe the ultimate question is _that _question."

"Maybe it's designed that way. Something to reveal a deep, _dark _secret."

"Dark. That's right."

"Oh, c'mon. Get over it. It was one time!"

"I still can't believe it."

"Well, we are getting married so I think its good it's out in the open."

"That's right. We're getting married. And we'll have a lot of children. Healthy, beautiful, smart, athletic children."

"Full of yourself, huh?"

"No more questions, please."

"That was rhetorical."

"But a question, nonetheless."

"I love you."

"I love you. But Draco, really?!"

* * *

**A/N:** Did you like it? "…" – Well, you know what this means.


End file.
